1 May 2008

The Blame Game

Insha-Allah, starting with this month, I'll be writing one article at the end of each month, the last article of the month. I'll try my best to choose the most relevant topic to be discussed and I hope you, the readers can give your honest and sincere response on my article.

Ok, for this month, I have decided to write on one of the most common characteristics that all of us possess; ego. Well, ego can be something useful sometimes. In fact, we do need ego. Like when times we are expected to stand up against perpetrators, or to defend our dignity and self-respect, ego can be a very powerful weapon. Furthermore, ego sometimes can be defined as self-esteem, or one's view about himself/herself. How you evaluate yourself. So there's nothing wrong to be egotistic.

But being overly egotistic is something else. Being irrationally egotistic can destroy one's self-respect towards you. An egoist is always hated by others. An egomaniac, as you can already guess, is deeply despised.You see, when you start being overwhelmingly egotistic, when something goes wrong, you'll blame others for it. Even when you know you have played a great part in the downfall of a project or anything, the fact that you feel so superior and important, you won't careless about putting the blame on you. Even the slightest one. Besides, it's always feel good to blame others huh? And easy too.

Sadly, this is what happened in virtually everywhere. A boss blames his employees for the little profit margins his company made. A senior doctor blames the trainees for the death of a patient. A husband blames his wife for the failure of the marriage and vice versa. Latest, Abdullah Ahmad Badawi blames Mahathir, Anwar, the medias, the saboteurs and the list goes on, for the poor performance of Barisan Nasional in the last election, when his own political shenanigans were clearly one of the major contributing factors. Of course, everyone did play his or her own role, but to solely put blames on others is simply stupid, arrogant and selfish.

There is absolutely nothing wrong to have some flaws, to admit your mistakes and weaknesses. It is, in fact, an act of such an utmost nobility. Umar al-Khattab r.a., during his tenureship as the second khalifah of the famous Khulafa' ar-Rasyidin, is known for his unbelievable humbleness and down-to-earth approach. There was this one incident when a group of Jews came to him and bombarded him with questions that he didn't have answers to, he openly admitted that he simply didn't know. Even when the Jews provoked him and started to question his position as the supposed Muslims' reference for almost every matter, he didn't budge, not even a little and simple repeated, "I do not know." He then called for 'Ali r.a. to come to his aid because he knew 'Ali possessed such a great wealth of knowledge. Another incident when Umar wanted to pass a legislation preventing women at that time to set high dowry for marriage, he was told by the women that that was their right as a woman and it is clearly stated in the Holy Book. Umar, being his usual honest and humble self, admitted his mistake and hence withdrew the notion. A simple act of sincerity and humility, yet gives a profound impact on our view towards him. He is indeed, such a great companion, leader and human being.

Can we expect such a quality in today's leaders? Probably, but very unlikely. Hey, look around, and you will agree with me...! Leaders these days are so egocentric and self-centered, machiavellistic and ah! I don't know, too much of bad and embarrassing qualities! *sigh* Where is people like Tun Hussein Onn, who stepped down voluntarily knowing his ailing health would affect his leadership? Or Tun Dr. Ismail, who was a reluctant politician, but stepped up for he knew people needed his contributions to the country? We need such people to run our beloved country. We are in desperate need, indeed...

To end this article, let us have a good read at this Malay's folk song. A typical example of the endless blame game, although in this particular case, it does have an end.

"Bangau oh bangau, kenapa engkau kurus?
Macam mana aku tak kurus,

Ikan tak nak timbul,
Ikan tak nak timbul.

Ikan oh ikan, kenapa tak nak timbul?

Macam mana aku nak timbul,

Rumput panjang sangat,
Rumput panjang sangat.

Rumput oh Rumput, kenapa panjang sangat?

Macam mana aku tak panjang,

Kerbau tak makan aku,
Kerbau tak makan aku.

Kerbau oh kerbau, kenapa tak makan rumput?

Macam mana aku tak makan,

Perut aku sakit,
Perut aku sakit.

Perut oh perut, kenapa engkau sakit?

Macam mana aku tak sakit,

Makan nasi mentah, Makan nasi mentah.

Nasi oh nasi, kenapa engkau mentah?

Macam mana aku tak mentah,

Kayu api basah, Kayu api basah.

Kayu oh kayu, kenapa engkau basah?
Macam mana aku tak basah,

Hujan timpa aku,
Hujan timpa aku.

Hujan oh hujan, kenapa timpa kayu?

Macam mana aku tak timpa,

Katak panggil aku,
Katak panggil aku.

Katak oh katak, kenapa panggil hujan,

Macam mana aku tak panggil,

Ular nak makan aku,
Ular nak makan aku.

Ular oh ular, kenapa nak makan katak?

Macam mana aku tak makan,

Memang makanan aku,


Let us follow the snake's noble quality. He ends the blame game by unashamedly admitting his pure intention! And at the end, he gains and wins when others have to suffer, thanks to their ego.


5 Caci Maki Puji Muji:

Anonymous 01/05/2008, 06:40  

after drained out my energy for the whole day .... completing 5 drawings...huhu....reading this article is quite pleasing.....but yet still not worth to read for me....hahaha......maybe u wonder why??..... sbb terlalu mcm APEKAHHH?? hahahaha.... aku suka topik tuh...sgt suka indeed.....but its simply not you!!.... i cant see you in this writing...as in ..simply buhsan..haha... u r writing as in copying facts n make them look as if they are completely urs....mmg laa sume tuh ko tulis....tp whats missing is.....ppl cannot see...siapa GABBANA.....this is personal blog ...but then.... you make it as blog for academics??....hahha.... your words is simply words frm books...your languange is not from ur HEART!!...

but then...maybe this is your PERSONALITY.....your own way of expressing things (while hiding yourself).....i RESPECT that....

mak aih...garangnye aku....hahah....saje je nk komen2 cket....ape yg kurasa...hahah... teringin nk baca ego dr perspektif ko sendiri...ko evaluate ego ko ke....ur friends.....xperience ko pasal ego2 nih....much2 more interesting..!!! try to write frm your heart.....while not bother abt what ppl gonna say...hahhaha...panjang gellll dah nih aku meraban...leh wat post baru..ahaks!!

Anonymous 01/05/2008, 06:52  

eh...saya sgt hormat cara kamu....tulisan tuh hanya ape yg dirasakan...jgn slah paham lak....hehs.....

Inche gabbana 01/05/2008, 13:54  

Hahaha.. Thanx for your honest response ed.. U've been too anxious about my writing style huh? Hehe...

But think about it, the fact that most of my articles (dolce's as well) are in the same format all over again, has it not crossed your mind that it IS me..? That is how I express my sincere self? ;)

Saya dibesarkan menjadi seorang pencerita (sekolah rendah) dan pembahas dan pemidato (sekolah menengah). So, using formal and 'skema' language is just a norm to me. In fact, sometimes i think that is the BEST way to express myself.

Whatever i wrote (and will write) are from my heart. ;p They are not pretentious and I am not hiding anything, except for my identity coz I see no harm doing that.

But thanx for your comment! Really appreciate it! Maybe i'll consider writing something more 'personal' and 'mesra' after this! Hehehe...


Anonymous 01/05/2008, 23:54  

dont change if its not you!!! drama plak ed nih....hahah (seriously pelikk ko panggil nama tuh)...hahah juz dont call me ed again....wakakakaka...

neway....aku bukan komen abt ur language sbnrnye...bukan dr segi bahasa...tp content die mcm ....entah laa sumthing's missing......apepun.....i totally respect it......cuma nafsu membc aku yg nk lebih kot...ahaks!!!

Anonymous 05/10/2008, 23:24  

u got stail u kno it rite?when ppl say "ukur baju pada badan sendiri"..dat is nt true all da time..sumtimes we simply kno baju kita..so keep rockin!

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