The Blame Game

Insha-Allah, starting with this month, I'll be writing one article at the end of each month, the last article of the month. I'll try my best to choose the most relevant topic to be discussed and I hope you, the readers can give your honest and sincere response on my article.

Ok, for this month, I have decided to write on one of the most common characteristics that all of us possess; ego. Well, ego can be something useful sometimes. In fact, we do need ego. Like when times we are expected to stand up against perpetrators, or to defend our dignity and self-respect, ego can be a very powerful weapon. Furthermore, ego sometimes can be defined as self-esteem, or one's view about himself/herself. How you evaluate yourself. So there's nothing wrong to be egotistic.

But being overly egotistic is something else. Being irrationally egotistic can destroy one's self-respect towards you. An egoist is always hated by others. An egomaniac, as you can already guess, is deeply despised.You see, when you start being overwhelmingly egotistic, when something goes wrong, you'll blame others for it. Even when you know you have played a great part in the downfall of a project or anything, the fact that you feel so superior and important, you won't careless about putting the blame on you. Even the slightest one. Besides, it's always feel good to blame others huh? And easy too.

Sadly, this is what happened in virtually everywhere. A boss blames his employees for the little profit margins his company made. A senior doctor blames the trainees for the death of a patient. A husband blames his wife for the failure of the marriage and vice versa. Latest, Abdullah Ahmad Badawi blames Mahathir, Anwar, the medias, the saboteurs and the list goes on, for the poor performance of Barisan Nasional in the last election, when his own political shenanigans were clearly one of the major contributing factors. Of course, everyone did play his or her own role, but to solely put blames on others is simply stupid, arrogant and selfish.

There is absolutely nothing wrong to have some flaws, to admit your mistakes and weaknesses. It is, in fact, an act of such an utmost nobility. Umar al-Khattab r.a., during his tenureship as the second khalifah of the famous Khulafa' ar-Rasyidin, is known for his unbelievable humbleness and down-to-earth approach. There was this one incident when a group of Jews came to him and bombarded him with questions that he didn't have answers to, he openly admitted that he simply didn't know. Even when the Jews provoked him and started to question his position as the supposed Muslims' reference for almost every matter, he didn't budge, not even a little and simple repeated, "I do not know." He then called for 'Ali r.a. to come to his aid because he knew 'Ali possessed such a great wealth of knowledge. Another incident when Umar wanted to pass a legislation preventing women at that time to set high dowry for marriage, he was told by the women that that was their right as a woman and it is clearly stated in the Holy Book. Umar, being his usual honest and humble self, admitted his mistake and hence withdrew the notion. A simple act of sincerity and humility, yet gives a profound impact on our view towards him. He is indeed, such a great companion, leader and human being.

Can we expect such a quality in today's leaders? Probably, but very unlikely. Hey, look around, and you will agree with me...! Leaders these days are so egocentric and self-centered, machiavellistic and ah! I don't know, too much of bad and embarrassing qualities! *sigh* Where is people like Tun Hussein Onn, who stepped down voluntarily knowing his ailing health would affect his leadership? Or Tun Dr. Ismail, who was a reluctant politician, but stepped up for he knew people needed his contributions to the country? We need such people to run our beloved country. We are in desperate need, indeed...

To end this article, let us have a good read at this Malay's folk song. A typical example of the endless blame game, although in this particular case, it does have an end.

"Bangau oh bangau, kenapa engkau kurus?
Macam mana aku tak kurus,
Ikan tak nak timbul, Ikan tak nak timbul.

Ikan oh ikan, kenapa tak nak timbul?
Macam mana aku nak timbul,
Rumput panjang sangat, Rumput panjang sangat.

Rumput oh Rumput, kenapa panjang sangat?
Macam mana aku tak panjang,
Kerbau tak makan aku, Kerbau tak makan aku.

Kerbau oh kerbau, kenapa tak makan rumput?
Macam mana aku tak makan,
Perut aku sakit, Perut aku sakit.

Perut oh perut, kenapa engkau sakit?
Macam mana aku tak sakit,
Makan nasi mentah, Makan nasi mentah.

Nasi oh nasi, kenapa engkau mentah?
Macam mana aku tak mentah,
Kayu api basah, Kayu api basah.

Kayu oh kayu, kenapa engkau basah?
Macam mana aku tak basah,
Hujan timpa aku, Hujan timpa aku.

Hujan oh hujan, kenapa timpa kayu?
Macam mana aku tak timpa,
Katak panggil aku, Katak panggil aku.

Katak oh katak, kenapa panggil hujan,
Macam mana aku tak panggil,
Ular nak makan aku, Ular nak makan aku.

Ular oh ular, kenapa nak makan katak?
Macam mana aku tak makan,
Memang makanan aku,
MEMANG MAKANAN AKU!!!"

Let us follow the snake's noble quality. He ends the blame game by unashamedly admitting his pure intention! And at the end, he gains and wins when others have to suffer, thanks to their ego.

-gabbana-